Michael Jackson Memories

I can't let the passing of pop icon Michael Jackson, the King of Pop, go without mention on my blog. My preteen/early teen years cannot be described without mention of the Thriller album poster that hung on my bedroom wall for about two years. I just loved Michael...his hair and how simply fine he looked in that white suit. My Mom let us scratch up her album listening to "You are the Lady in my Life" and "PYT" over and over again. And, it was just this February that I sat down at the computer one day out of the blue and downloaded all of Michael Jackson's hits from Itunes. I reflected on how one summer I had puppy love for a boy in my neighborhood visiting his relatives, I fell for him because we all thought he looked a little something like Michael Jackson. I got so embarrassed and humiliated by this rotten boy when he told one of the older girls that he fell for that I liked him! I decided then that he was no Michael Jackson who I knew to be way nicer than that. Michael Jackson moved to music like no one else I've ever seen. Instead of him dancing to music it seemed to have played to him. He could bounce and pop to a beat in complete rhythm. I am in complete awe of his raw talent. He was pre hip hop, sold millions, no cursing or degrading. He created style after style, everyone wanted the glove, the jacket, the socks, and the moves! After Thriller my interests in Michael waned, but he had me once again with Dangerous. I remain in admiration of his philanthrophic spirit, love for those with less, appreciation for animals, and willingness to still love people (even though I think people's interest in him caused some terrible damage to his life). While what he did gave me so much in my teen years, I don't think he ever got a chance to experience life as a teen should. My life continues to be blessed by all the music he made so many of his songs stimulate me in a way that I do not get from any other artists' recordings. I know that Michael Jackson will live on and on through Don't Stop Til You Get Enough, Rock with You, Wanna Be Startin Somethin, Off the Wall, Remember the Time, Jam, Can't Let Her Get Away, Bad, Man in the Mirror, ...the list goes on. I pray that heaven is blessing him with peace and the ability to just walk around freely!

Letter from Aunt to Niece

I have a niece graduating from middle school this month...I am the oh so proud Aunt who wants to be there every step of the way, but accept that that is an impossibility. She has been a good girl, gotten extremely good grades and stayed sweet and engaged through her young years. She just turned 14! I know many of us hold a special place in our hearts for nieces and nephews and feel in some way we can share the things we've learned and help them along a slightly easier road than the one we took. I have decided to share my letter to her with my readers.

Dear My Sweet and Beautiful Niece Tristen,

As you move on from Middle School to High School the best gift I could think of to give you was my love and my thoughts about things in life that I have experienced. I know you may have your own opinion about a “good gift” , but I hope you will understand why I thought this to be more valuable. I know that you may also have your own opinions on the things I write in this note, my opinion is not necessarily better than yours, I am just giving you some additional perspective...

High school is a good time to set a tone for your life…a prelude to the person you see yourself becoming…the intellectual, the athlete, the social butterfly, fashionista, conservative, politically /socially aware, flamboyant… a self created mix of them all. Explore what really interests YOU! Also, know that this is an ongoing part of life you will evolve into many personalities and personas over the many years, but there will always be an underlying theme.

Don't get too caught up in the small things – homecomings/proms, who said what, who's dating who, all that nonsense - because in the grand scheme of things it doesn’t matter. Keep focused on your studies and having fun with your friends… do what you think feels right , what you think is fun, stay friends with people who you know value you (because they demonstrate it) and keep in touch with them. You don’t need to be in a clique..just hang with people who are on your level of thinking and kindness…those who elevate you and themselves not those who say and do degrading things.

Your friends are just that, they should not and do not define you…be yourself and spend some time reflecting on who you really are and why you (and everyone else who loves you) like that person so much

Stay committed to your studies and good grades…but know that one bad score does not crash the world..pick your self up and do better on the upcoming tests, papers, projects…keep knowing that you can and will graduate at the top. As you go through each of the 4 years, keep in mind what you want out of life…college you want to attend, career you want to have, other goals.

School work first! But… then, friends, social activities, and other school activities should be prioritized in the way that makes you feel most satisfied and successful

Listen to your heart; people will say and do things - if it doesn't feel right - pay attention

It may be tough not to follow the trends, but it will be better in the end…do what Tristen enjoys not what everyone else is doing!

When you feel like you don't belong and you're unsure of yourself, don't forget that everyone else feels the same way, even if they don't show it

Don't put anything on Facebook or Flickr you might regret later

Get involved and try new things. There are things outside of high school that help teenagers realize that there is more to life than what happens within those walls. Challenge yourself to focus on the things you want, not the things you think other people want you to be….making your parents proud will be a direct result of making yourself proud! You'll make mistakes and learn lessons beyond the books and lectures, but life is long and 4 years will never define one person. Enjoy the friendships and embrace the challenges and you'll cherish the memories for the rest of your life...even the bad ones that will help turn you into a well rounded person.

Identify some people who impress you…identify those qualities that you most like and implement them for your self….for example your Mom, Dad, grandparents, even ME, someone like Michelle Obama or Oprah, Harriett Tubman, Sojourner Truth!…people past/present you think you look up to. Anything they’ve accomplished you can too!

Get the most out of your classes. Take advantage of the good grades you make that will lead to free trips, memberships, conferences, events and “once in a lifetime” opportunities.

Keep doing modeling for as long as you like it!

HS is a fun and positive time that involves friends, some drama and work. You will be shaping the next decade by your behavior, so try hard to think before you act. Talk to your parents everyday. Stay connected to trusted adults. Know that you can talk to them, your grandparents, or me about anything!

Be a teenager, enjoy being young without taking on any adult responsibilities or problems.

Dating….there is no hurry to start…be smart and selective…ask and be open to your parents’ feedback and advice on when and who to date. Contrary to what’s popular, dating is NOT a must in high school there are plenty of other things to keep you busy.

Take great pictures of all your fun times so you can look back on them, laugh a lot, stay committed to being healthy and happy!

I think you are special and precious, one of God’s greatest gifts and I look forward to watching you go through high school, come into your own, and enjoying the best of what life offers!

I am so happy for what God has done to bless you.

Congratulations on your accomplishments!